Laugh-Out-Loud with the Best Broad City Quotes: Hilarious Gems from Abbi and Ilana!

If you're a fan of witty humor, relatable characters, and outrageous situations, then you've probably heard of Broad City. This popular Comedy Central show follows the misadventures of two twenty-something best friends, Abbi and Ilana, as they navigate life in New York City. One of the standout features of the show is its hilarious dialogue, filled with quotable one-liners and zingers that will leave you laughing out loud. From Abbi's neurotic tendencies to Ilana's wacky antics, there's never a dull moment on Broad City.

One of the most iconic quotes from the show comes from Ilana, who declares, I'm a sexual X-Man. I'm like Wolverine, but with less adamantium and more sex appeal. This line perfectly captures Ilana's outrageous personality and her unwavering confidence in her own sexuality. It's just one example of the many bold and unapologetic statements that the characters on Broad City are known for.

Another memorable quote comes from Abbi, who says, I don't have FOMO, I have FOTI. Fear of the Internet. This line taps into the very real anxiety that many people feel when it comes to social media and online communication. It's a humorous take on a common issue that many viewers can relate to.

Of course, not all of the quotes from Broad City are lighthearted. The show often tackles serious issues, such as gender inequality, racism, and mental health. One poignant line comes from Ilana, who tells Abbi, We're queens, we're warriors, we're goddesses. We're also just humans, and we need to take care of ourselves. This quote highlights the importance of self-care and self-love, especially in a world that can be so harsh and unforgiving.

Despite the serious themes that the show touches on, Broad City never loses its sense of humor. Even when the characters are facing tough situations, they manage to find the humor in them. For example, when Abbi and Ilana accidentally ingest some strong marijuana edibles, they end up having a wild adventure that includes singing karaoke, stealing office supplies, and getting lost in the city. It's a hilarious episode that showcases the show's ability to turn even the most stressful situations into comedic gold.

Another quote that perfectly captures the show's irreverent humor comes from Ilana, who says, I am an adult, and I can eat whatever I want whenever I want, and I wish someone would take this power from me. This line is both funny and relatable, as many of us have probably experienced the guilt and regret that comes with indulging in our favorite foods a little too often.

One of the things that makes Broad City so beloved by fans is its unabashed celebration of female friendship. Abbi and Ilana's relationship is at the heart of the show, and their bond is both hilarious and heartwarming. One memorable quote comes from Abbi, who tells Ilana, You are my sister, and we are ride or die. And I'm gonna die riding this bike. It's a sweet moment that shows just how much these two friends care for each other.

Overall, Broad City is a show that is full of memorable quotes and hilarious moments. Whether you're a die-hard fan or just tuning in for the first time, you're sure to find something to love about this irreverent comedy. From its relatable characters to its witty dialogue, there's no denying that Broad City has left its mark on pop culture.

The Hilarious World of Broad City Quotes

It's been six years since the first episode of Broad City aired on Comedy Central, and ever since then, it has been a cult favorite among fans. Created by Ilana Glazer and Abbi Jacobson, the show follows the hilarious misadventures of two best friends in New York City. And while the show is filled with laugh-out-loud moments, some of the most memorable lines come from the characters themselves. Here are some of the best Broad City quotes that will have you giggling for days.

I'm like a sexual X-Man. I'm like Storm, but with jizz instead of rain.

One of the most iconic lines from Ilana Wexler, this quote perfectly captures her outrageous personality. Ilana is never one to hold back, and this quote is just one example of her bold and unapologetic nature. It's also a testament to the show's commitment to pushing boundaries and exploring taboo topics with humor.

I have a pimple on my nipple and I'm afraid it's cancer.

Abbi Abrams may be the more reserved of the two friends, but she's just as funny as Ilana. This quote is a perfect example of Abbi's neurotic tendencies. It's also a reminder that even though the show is filled with absurd situations, it still manages to touch on real-life issues and insecurities in a funny and relatable way.

I'm just a girl standing in front of a boy asking him to fuck her.

Ilana's boldness is on full display in this classic quote. It's a nod to the famous line from Notting Hill, but with a raunchy twist that's all Ilana. This line perfectly encapsulates the show's irreverent humor and willingness to push boundaries.

I'm a witch, I'm a motherfucking witch.

Ilana may not actually be a witch, but she certainly has a way of casting a spell over everyone she meets. This quote is another example of her confident and unapologetic nature. It's also a reminder that sometimes the most hilarious lines are the simplest ones.

I don't know how to use a tampon, but I'll figure it out. I'm like MacGyver, but for tampons.

Abbi may not be as sexually adventurous as Ilana, but she's certainly not shy when it comes to discussing her body. This quote is a perfect example of Abbi's quirky sense of humor and her willingness to embrace her quirks and imperfections.

I am queen of the world, get on my back.

Ilana's confidence is infectious, and this quote is a perfect example of that. It's a reminder that even in the face of adversity, Ilana always maintains her swagger and never backs down from a challenge.

I'm not a feminist, I'm a humanist.

Ilana's views on feminism are a recurring theme throughout the show, and this quote is one of the most memorable. It's a reminder that the show isn't just about laughs, but also about exploring important issues and ideas in a thoughtful and humorous way.

That's like trying to say which part of a rainbow is your favorite.

Ilana's response to Abbi asking her which part of her personality is her favorite is just one example of the show's quick-witted humor. It's also a reminder of the deep bond between the two friends and their ability to make each other laugh no matter what.

I tried to watch porn once, but it was just too sad.

Abbi's awkwardness and vulnerability are on full display in this quote. It's a reminder that even though the show is filled with outrageous humor, it also has moments of genuine emotion and heart.

I'm not afraid of anything, except for bears and STDs.

Ilana's fearlessness may be one of her defining traits, but even she has her limits. This quote is a hilarious reminder that even the most confident and unapologetic people have their fears and insecurities.

The Bottom Line

Broad City is a show that's filled with hilarious quotes and unforgettable moments. Whether you're a die-hard fan or a newcomer to the series, these quotes are sure to make you laugh out loud. From Ilana's boldness to Abbi's awkwardness, the characters in Broad City are a reminder that sometimes the most hilarious moments come from being true to yourself and embracing your quirks and imperfections. So the next time you need a good laugh, just remember: Yas queen!

Broad City Quotes: The Epitome of Humor

Are you looking for a good laugh? Look no further than the iconic Broad City quotes. This show is a true masterpiece, and its hilarious characters Abbi and Ilana are the epitome of humor. Let's take a look at some of their best one-liners.

I'm an adult baby, but this adult baby's got problems. - Abbi

If there's one thing Abbi knows for sure, it's that being an adult is tough. But being an adult baby? That's a whole different level of difficulty. Abbi's quote perfectly sums up the struggle of trying to navigate life while feeling like a child on the inside.

I got a drunk tattoo of my own name. - Ilana

Ilana is known for her wild antics, and getting a drunk tattoo of her own name just adds to her legend. It's hard not to admire someone who is so confident in themselves that they want to permanently ink their own name on their body.

I can't go in there, I'm wearing my 'last chance for romance' jeans. - Abbi

We all have that one outfit that we wear when we're feeling extra confident and ready to take on the world. For Abbi, those are her last chance for romance jeans. Unfortunately, they don't always lead to a successful love life, but at least she looks good while trying.

I should really stop buying snacks for my apartment, they're gone by the time I get home. - Ilana

Snacks are a crucial part of any successful Netflix and chill session, but for Ilana, they don't even make it that far. Her love for snacks is so strong that they disappear before she even has a chance to enjoy them.

I haven't renewed my license in four years, but I have renewed my commitment to being a bad driver. - Abbi

Abbi may not be the best driver on the road, but at least she's committed to being consistently bad. After all, practice makes perfect, right?

I hate pants. - Ilana

Who needs pants when you can wear a cozy pair of sweatpants or a cute skirt? For Ilana, pants are just another unnecessary obstacle in life.

I just got my first period in three months, it's like my uterus is on a juice cleanse. - Abbi

Abbi's period may be a pain to deal with, but at least she has a sense of humor about it. Her analogy of her uterus being on a juice cleanse perfectly captures the discomfort and inconvenience of menstruation.

I feel like I'm the Marcia Clark of Bed Bath & Beyond. - Ilana

Ilana may not be a lawyer, but she takes her job as a Bed Bath & Beyond employee very seriously. She's the Marcia Clark of the store, ready to take on any challenge that comes her way.

I'm gonna blow up this Whole Foods like it's fucking Beirut. - Abbi

Abbi's frustration with Whole Foods may be relatable, but her solution may be a bit extreme. Still, her over-the-top statement perfectly captures the feeling of wanting to lash out when things don't go our way.

My grandma's dead, but she's still judging me from the grave. - Ilana

Grandmas may be gone, but their opinions live on forever. For Ilana, her grandma's judgmental gaze is a constant presence in her life, reminding her to always strive for perfection.

Overall, the Broad City quotes are a testament to the show's brilliant writing and comedic timing. Whether you're looking for a quick laugh or a new life motto, these quotes have got you covered. So go ahead, embrace your inner Abbi or Ilana, and quote away!

Broad City Quotes: The Humorous Side of Life

The Story of Broad City Quotes

If you're looking for a good laugh, then look no further than Broad City. This hilarious show follows two twenty-something best friends, Ilana and Abbi, as they navigate their way through life in New York City. Along the way, they deliver some of the funniest quotes ever heard on television.

One of the most memorable quotes from the show is when Ilana says, I'm like a sexual X-Men. You put me in a room and I can sense dicks. This line perfectly captures Ilana's quirky personality and her love of all things sexual. It's no wonder that she has become a fan favorite and has inspired countless memes and gifs.

Another iconic quote is when Abbi says, I don't have FOMO. I have JOMO. Joy of missing out. This quote perfectly sums up Abbi's laid-back attitude towards life. She's not worried about missing out on anything because she knows that she's happy with what she has.

The Point of View of Broad City Quotes

The point of view of Broad City quotes is one that is relatable to anyone who has ever felt lost or unsure about their place in the world. Ilana and Abbi are both struggling to find their way in life, but they do so with a sense of humor and a positive attitude.

The show also tackles important issues such as sexuality, gender, and race, but does so in a way that is both humorous and respectful. Ilana's character is openly bisexual, and the show doesn't shy away from showing her relationships with both men and women. Abbi's character is also shown to be supportive of Ilana's sexuality, which is a refreshing change from the typical portrayal of female friendships on television.

Table Information

Here are some of the most memorable quotes from Broad City:

I'm like a sexual X-Men. You put me in a room and I can sense dicks. - Ilana
I don't have FOMO. I have JOMO. Joy of missing out. - Abbi
I am a boss-ass bitch. - Abbi
Yas queen! - Ilana
I want to be able to fart in front of you, but I'm scared it's going to smell bad. - Ilana

If you're in need of a good laugh, then look no further than Broad City. With its hilarious quotes and relatable characters, it's sure to put a smile on your face.

So long, Broad City lovers!

Well, folks, it looks like we've reached the end of our journey through the wacky world of Broad City quotes. We hope you've enjoyed the ride as much as we have! Before we say goodbye for good, we wanted to leave you with a few parting thoughts.

First of all, if you've never watched Broad City, what are you waiting for? Seriously, this show is hilarious, weird, and totally unique. It's like nothing else on TV, and we're so grateful that we got to spend some time exploring its many quotable moments with you.

But even if you're a die-hard fan of the show, we hope that this little collection of Broad City quotes has given you some fresh perspectives on some of your favorite moments. We love how these quotes can speak to all kinds of situations in life, from the mundane to the absurd.

For example, have you ever had a day where you just can't seem to get anything done? Maybe you're feeling overwhelmed or uninspired. Well, as Ilana once said, I woke up like this. Flawless...part of the time.

Or perhaps you're dealing with a difficult coworker or family member. In that case, take a page out of Abbi's book and remember that the only thing worse than a Monday is a Sunday night before a Monday.

Really, the possibilities are endless when it comes to using Broad City quotes in your everyday life. And we think that's part of what makes this show so special.

Of course, we'd be remiss if we didn't mention some of our all-time favorite Broad City quotes before we go.

Who could forget Ilana's iconic declaration that I have the libido of a ninety-year-old turtle? Or Abbi's sage advice to never trust a b**** with a messy bun?

And then there are the moments that make us laugh out loud every time, like when Abbi and Ilana try to make a quick buck by selling knockoff handbags on the street corner and end up getting chased by a group of angry tourists.

But really, every episode of Broad City is filled with quotable gems. We could go on and on, but we'll spare you for now.

Instead, we just want to say thank you for joining us on this journey through some of the show's most hilarious and memorable moments. We hope that you've enjoyed reliving them as much as we have.

And who knows? Maybe one day we'll all be lucky enough to get a reboot of Broad City and create a whole new set of quotes to love and cherish.

Until then, stay weird, stay funny, and always remember that it's not about the pasta.